loss
A change in weather is predicted over the next few days with highs near seventy rather than the ninety degree temperatures we have been experiencing. This will be a welcomed change. Not all change is greeted with such enthusiasm. A dear friend recently left for an eternity in the arms of God. A loved cousin is battling multiples of ailments now as she patiently endures the caretaking at the local medical center. Producing my signature is an undertaking that previously required little thinking but now requires full attention to range of motion. Too much concentration on any one thing renders a trembling right hand that I’ve grown accustomed to humorously slapping back to attention. Sometimes change means loss and at other times change means to gain. Whether loss or gain change is a condition of life. Sometimes that change is met with grief and at other times it is met with joy. Gratitude for the journey is the fuel that propels the engine of faith that sustains us through the grief and lifts us in the joy. The charge given by the Apostle Paul to the believers in Thessalonica is wise; “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)
By: Cathy Garrott
I am one who likes to wear simple accessories. When I was in high school I loved broaches, pins, hair accessories, necklaces, and bracelets. Jewelry was a safe choice if one had to purchase a gift for me. In college I pierced my ears (yup, I did it myself) and earrings were added to my list of accessories. After I moved to Japan (32 years ago) I began to “tone it down” and not wear accessories so much, though I wore earrings almost every day. Bracelets were the first to go – hard to keep out of the dough when you make bread often, and hard to keep out of the dishwater. Necklaces quickly became a thing of the past when I began to break out any time I wore them in the humid summer heat. I took up wearing scarfs instead. I cut my long hair (well, I had it cut – couldn’t do THAT myself successfully), and my hair accessories were put aside. Little by little my accessories were put aside, though I still liked to feel “dressy” and wore broaches and earrings and scarfs.
Several months before I was diagnosed with PD I found I was having trouble putting on my earrings, so, sadly, those joined the “things of the past” items on my dresser. I was angry and frustrated over this turn of events! Then I was diagnosed with PD and realized this was a part of the package that came with PD. This past Christmas I found I was having trouble with putting on certain broaches. I decided it was time to take control of my situation and not sit around and bemoan my losses. I began to think of people who had specifically admired certain of my accessories and began to give those items to those people. Seeing their joy on having been chosen to receive that item has enabled me to be filled with joy as I let it go. I know that they will treasure it and remember me whenever they wear it.
When one has PD there are lots of things that gradually go by the wayside. Learning to let go and live without them is a point of frustration that we learn to deal with, or cause ourselves a lot of misery if we attempt to deny them. But think about it, people without PD have to learn these same things as they age. Loss comes to everyone at some point in our lives. We get to choose how we deal with it. It is a privilege and a lesson we all must learn … with or without PD. Looking at things with this perspective … that it’s not just US having to go through this process of letting go … SHOULD be liberating from the lie that causes us to wallow in self-pity (which causes us more emotional pain). Don’t let this get the best of you! Learn to adjust your thinking and understand that every person has to let things go.
In the quiet of the early morning before the bustle of the day commenced, I sat quietly in the consuming arms of peace that enfolded me like a blanket of warmth. Gone were the fits of anger from the day before and gone was the dread of physical challenges and the nag of pains. Though the pesky visitors might return, they were quiet and still at that moment. The lyrics of a hymn recently sung by the church choir descended upon my thoughts and I sank into the arms of comfort as I recalled the words. “When peace like a river attendeth my way, when sorrows like sea billows roll, whatever my lot thou hast taught me to (know) say, it is well, it is well, with my soul.” The hymn by Horatio Spafford was penned after having lost all his wealth in the Chicago fire of 1871, then having lost all four daughters in a shipwreck on the Atlantic a short while later. These words “came to him” as he later sailed past the very spot of the tragic accident that took the lives of his beloved daughters. I do not in any way equate my loss of nimbleness to the loss of life of a loved child. I believe I would endure whatever personal pain and torment tossed my way if it meant a safe and healthy life for my children. What all of us share at one time or another is the sense of loss and its attendant grief. What all may also share is the attendant “peace that passes all understanding,” that waits to be greeted at the door of grace. Today, I am grateful for hearing the knock and for flinging the door wide to that embrace of peace.