Mastery

In that twilight moment between dreams and conscious awareness of one’s surroundings a movement or sound can jolt one into a state far from sleep. Suddenly dreams have been supplanted by obsessive thoughts of things about which nothing can be done at the moment. Intent to “take control” of these obsessive thoughts renders one totally out of control as more of the impossible floods the consciousness. There seemed to be three choices that could be engaged: Continue the battle for control and flop from side to side seeking comfort between the sheets; secondly, one could seek to surrender thoughts in prayer noting no need to be in control and relax in the comfort that may come from that; or lastly, get up and change the environment all together. Having pursued the first two with vigor, this semi-weary soul chose to rise from the confines of the sheets and the accompanying obsessive thoughts and engage in minor chores as the morning dose of dopamine supplement took hold. In a place now where impossible tasks no longer weigh on consciousness, we are better positioned to give thanks for restful restoration that was accomplished and the dismantling of the weight of obsessive thoughts. As the sun now rises through the mist of earth’s emission, we rest with gratitude as we anticipate an early nap. Thankfully, control is not mine to master!