The ache was becoming more and more intense. Turning from side to side and then on the back offered only momentary relief. It seemed useless to stay in bed any longer since the pain in the lumbar was not relenting and no place was offering a respite. This experience seems to be arising as the norm. Thoughts run rampantly to a place that questions what I might have done that caused this now common occurrence. PD, age, a lumbar cyst or any other number of things may be behind the throb, but nothing that I can recall doing shows me a direct link. In the Gospel of John, chapter 9, the disciples ask Jesus as they happen by a blind man Jesus will soon heal whether the man or his parents have sinned, causing the blindness. Jesus surprised them with His response; “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him.” Gratitude fills my heart that opportunities exist to emerge from the bed and “walk off” the discomfort. Thankfulness that grace is sufficient to free me from the throws of self-deceptive belief (and action) that I can always have it my way permeates my thoughts. The pain may not completely go away but the burden of self-reliance and determination, when surrendered, leads to a “heart” healing that is the victory. Gratitude outweighs the pain and lifts the heart to a higher place when touching that place of surrender!
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